Are you a Jackson Pollack thinker?
Hello! If you are a Jackson Pollack thinker, contact me.
We need to get tangential and circumstantial together.
I must warn you in advance!! My wheelhouse does not include navigational skills. 🙂
All jokes aside, many of you reading this know what I mean. A gaggle of “Jackson Pollack Thinkers” can walk and talk and follow the splattering of conversation with ease. On the other hand, many others are flummoxed with all the unnecessary words. I’ve worked with couples who don’t get it, and keep doing the same thing and getting the same results. One of the pair is a JP thinker and the other is more linear, or solution focused. One is not better than the other, they are different. You have to know your partner’s or friend’s style of communication in order to have an edifying and mutually satisfying relationship. Otherwise, one in the pair will stone wall the other, or find a person who can really hear them (AKA often another JP thinker). Again, it’s not better or worse. It’s different. Some can tolerate a tangential thinker while others can’t. That’s OK too. Just know that and own it.
For example, one person in the partnership (this is not a gender issue by the way) throws out a lot of information at one time in a very detailed, but tangential at the same time, kind of way. They look at it, hear it, say it, feel it, and just create a painting much like how Mr. Pollack paints. Read more here about JP’s style of painting. It’s more organized and strategic than you’d think.
For many of us, this style of thinking is a problem solving process. No solution needed, just a sounding board. The other partner might be a solution focused kind of person. The JP style of problem solving, repetition, and crazy like processing is maddening. In their minds, the issue at hand does not make sense and does not require so many words. It’s called “flooding” to a different style of thinker. Why does it matter?
It matters because if a pair, couple, or duo are struggling communicating their needs and wants, it could be a simple solution. Not always. Relationships are complicated. This is just one area I want to address because I have the tendency to paint my words like JP. Those who know and love me will ask me to shut up. Sometimes I do and sometimes I don’t. I just had a Dr. tell me I was giving him too much information, too fast. He threatened to go into his office so he could think. It was very funny and led to me wanting to talk about this difference in communication styles.
Many books have been written about this topic. Like, Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus, and Men are like waffles and women are like Spaghetti. These books suggest this is a gender issue. I beg to differ. Any gender, identity, or individual can be a JP thinker, or a Cubist thinker, or a combo of the two. What’s important here, is understanding the difference, and then choosing your dancing partner. This issue can make or break a partnership. Again, relationships are more than just about communication. This is one of the many parts to a relationship.
So, not to belabor this topic any longer, here are a few Tips from the Circuitous Trail:
- If you are a JP thinker, just know you have the capacity to “flood or overdose” a solution focused or Cubist type thinker. I’d love to hear from any artist out there if this metaphor is correct, or resonates with them. Thank you in advance for commenting. 🙂
- If you are not a JP thinker, it’s your responsibility to speak up, discuss, and set a boundary around getting “flooded.”
- Another option is to ask the JP thinker, ” is this an issue you want me to be a sounding board for, or are you asking for my input?”
- If the partner just wants to “be heard,” and you can tolerate it, parrot back what you hear.
- If you can’t tolerate it at the time your partner is flooding you, kindly say you need some time to ponder this splattering of information, and desire some quiet space. The JP thinker needs to respect their partner’s style of thinking and communicating as well. Again, way different, but not better or worse.
- Check out a previous blog about Emotional Texting. Many JP Thinkers get a bit carried away with their texting. Another “flooding” issue for a person who has a different style.
- Contact Trailtalk if you need more assistance understanding these varied styles of seeing, feeling and touching the world ( The Who – See Me, Feel Me).
Happy trails to those who choose the beaten path, and to those who bushwhack and get lost.
Hopefully, we all get out of the woods at some point, alive and well.
Enjoy this day. Allison