Relationships: should I stay or should I go?
Is this relationship for life or is it just for this season?
A life long friend versus a season of life friend is as different as Madea is from Brene’ Brown. Brene’ Brown is a leader in the mental health world. She’s a researcher, and a trained professional. Madea, on the other hand, is Tyler Perry’s fictitious character who’s training ground was her own home. Her hard knocks life is how she learned the difference between inner circle friends and season of life friends.
Madea is blunt and funny. She sounds like a Nike commercial – “just do it.” Watch Madea give relationship advice (start at 4:55 minute).
Brene’ Brown is funny too. Yet, her delivery of a similar message encourages us to turn the mirror toward ourselves and discover the root cause of the why, and how of our relationships. Watch Brene’ Brown talk about Shame.
Madea and Brene’ Brown offer up insight into understanding, enjoying, and in some instances, letting go of relationships not meant for a life time.
As we end this season of our lives, it may behoove us to consider where we are in our relationships. “Should I stay or should I go?” ~ The Clash.
Here a few Tips from the trail:
1.“If someone wants to walk out of your life, let them go.” ~ Madea.
This doesn’t mean you shouldn’t work at your long time relationships. If you identify areas of conflict and your friend is willing to fix it, then roll up your sleeves up and work at it together. On the other hand, if you tell your friend or partner what they are doing is hurting you, and they keep doing it, you need reevaluate this relationship, and most likely let it go.
Are you working way too hard in a relationship with someone?
When you are the best you can be, and feel worse about yourself when you leave their presence, heed this red flag.
2. If you have 2 or 3 friends you know have your back, you are blessed.
These are what I call INNER CIRCLE friends. Like the rings of a tree, the inner circle is the deepest and closest. These loved ones will be at your hospital bedside when you take your last breath. These friends/family members will love you when you are good or when you are bad, and when you are happy and when you are sad. They might not condone your behavior, but they won’t leave your side when you need them the most.
3. “Vulnerability is not weakness.” ~ Brene’ Brown.
When you are vulnerable with a friend/partner, and don’t feel judged or shameful, then you’ve found your inner circle friend right there. See Brene’ Brown’s TEDTALK on vulnerability.
I hope Madea and Dr. Brown made you laugh, and at the same time, pause and think about your relationships.
Happy trails to you and yours, Allison
